three meditations on desire
(These poems were written in January 2007. The second part was published in 2008 by Meritage Press as part of The Hay(na)ku Anthology, Vol. II [available here]. Because it’s part of a set, I’m publishing the entire long poem here for the first time. More below the cut.)
Three Meditations on Desire [a hay(na)ku triptych]
For R.
1. Origami
I
can’t hold
you tightly enough.
Try
as I
might, it seems
as
though there’s
just a little
space
left which
cannot be traversed.
I
lie on
top of you
hoping
that somehow
gravity will help:
the
earth pulling
me into itself,
and
thus into
you as well.
Unsurprisingly,
that tactic
isn’t effective either.
The
only solution
is to fold
you
up, like
paper manipulated from
a
two-dimensional
state into the
form
of a
crane. Then, I’ll
place
you in
my chest, and
unfold
you, gently,
so that you
fill
me from
within, like a
2. Respiration
In
through the
nose, and out
through
the mouth;
that was my
coach’s
advice as
we ran while
playing
sports when
I was younger.
But
this is
a different sport
altogether,
and that
method of breathing
is
not quite
doing the job.
I
try to
breathe you in –
(”fill
my head
with your perfume,”
to
paraphrase the
old Sinatra tune)
and
only get
the barest sense
of
what it
would feel like
to
have you
in my lungs.
Breathe
in, breathe
out; breathe in,
breathe
out; breathe
in, breathe out.
I
inhale, and
catch your scent;
I exhale, and
sigh your
name.
3. Sacrament
Metabolism!
There’s an
answer: incorporate you
into
me, fill
my every cell
with
the energy
from your flesh.
A
bite of
your leg, your
breast,
your thigh:
and with each
motion
of my
jaw, I hear
you
sigh, dreamily
yet with conviction:
“take, eat: this
is my
body.”